Sunday, March 29, 2009

After 4 Years it has Finally Happened!!!




A picture is worth a thousand words! In this case a video prevents a thousand words. For those who do not know when I was a boy my parents named me the "Mouth of the South." I thought it was because when I was 10 I liked WWF Wrestling and there was a joker who was named the Mouth of the South.

Come to find out I had the nickname first and the name was given to me because I used to talk a lot. By a lot I mean all the time. Well my boys have taken my talent and taken it to the next level. In fact my Dad said when referring to Logan, "you put in a nickel and get a buck 25."

This picture is my boys watching a movie. Jill and I wrestle with how much t.v. time the kids should get. We would rather teach them and have them engaged in good works. The trouble is when I have two boys that's a total of $2.50 and remember I only put in a dime.

When we put movies on, BOTH boys now will watch. I've waited for this day for 4 long years. It's so great not to have them asking questions in machine gun fashion. They don't fight, hit, argue, or put their hands on each other when a cartoon is on. I'm forced to ask myself, how can something we are told is so bad..... be so good?

Jill is such a wonderful, smart, patient mother she likes to spend time with them. But let the record show, on Wednesday nights when she has to go to church meetings, the boys will watch a lot of t.v.

Wednesday, March 18, 2009

Best Week of the Year for Sports!

So this is the best week of the year for sports fans everywhere. Indeed the NBA finals are cool, baseball fans like the World Series, and the Superbowl is the best single event. Not even to mention Golf, Nascar, or the American Idol finale.

I love playing hookey from work to watch part of the Madness. This week displays the ultimate of what sports stands for. We get to see Cinderella stories, upsets, and of course the bracketology. For you linguists out there yes bracketology is a word in the month of March.

I've never been all that great at picking brackets in the local office pool. After 16 years of picking March Maddness brackets this much I know. NEVER NEVER NEVER bet on the Cougars of BYU. As a loyal Cougar fan this has been very disapointing to me. The Cougs have hurt me real bad.

Good luck to everyone out there as you experience the emotional highs and lows of the next few weeks.

Oh by the way I got a promotion at work and now my title is Associate Vice President.

Wednesday, March 11, 2009

I fought the law and...... I won!

One of the major differences between my wife and I is our taste in cities. I went to school in Cedar City, population 28,000 (at the time) and she went to a University that had that many people enrolled! While I would be perfectly content living in small town American, she likes the big city. We have compromised and have settled in the suburbs.

My distaste for big cities goes beyond not liking them. I really don't care for big cities at all. I don't like all the people and the difficulty of getting from point A to point B.

So I went downtown about a month ago to see a basketball game. Not just any game, but the Lakers V Jazz. Great game and the Jazz won! However when I got to my car to drive home, there was a parking ticket on my windshield. I HATE DOWNTOWN! As a side-note about a year ago I went to a Jazz V Laker game, got a parking ticket, and in my anger got a speeding ticket 5 minutes later!

This time I'd had enough and it's time to stand up for myself say, "I'm mad as hell and I'm not going to take it anymore!"

I decided to take on City Hall! My infraction was parking to close to a fire hydrant. "Too close" is defined as 5 feet on either side of a line drawn from the fire hydrant to the curb.

Clearly the reason why parking isn't allowed is for the safety of the citizens. Emergency vehicles may need to access the hydrant and need that space for hoses.

It occurred to me that throughout the city, there are tons of legal parking spots in violation of this city code. "Wait, how is this so?", your asking yourself. Well, the way it works is if you PAY a PARKING MEETER then it's perfectly legal to violate the city parking code.


Hypocrisy, Double Standard, Greed. These are just a few of the words that describe this practice. I took my case to Salt Lake Cities hearing officer and she got so angry with my position we took a field trip outside the courtroom to see first hand a parking meeter within 2 feet of a hydrant! She got even more angry and told me I was guilty and would need to pay an additional $75 (nuisance fee) if I wanted to see a judge to present my case.

Let it be known that my youngest child gets his stubborn streak from his father. I would rather pay the extortion money and see a judge to state my case, than concede to the hearing officer (cashier).

Today was my day in court. I took my case to the city of Salt Lake City, and won! Clearly I need to take my fancy lawyering skills to the next level. I wonder if California needs help defending prop 8?

It was music to my ears to hear those beautiful words.... "Case Dismissed!"